Receiving criticism or having others criticize you is a difficult thing. Yes, we know that nobody is perfect but when some people take that fact and try to rub it all over you as if they are better off, it can be quite painful. I have learned that when someone takes it upon themselves to look into my matter, they do it for one of the following reasons:
1) They care about me and want me to a better person.
2) They are selfish and do not want to.
3) Inferiority complex is at work. They feel your shine is getting too much and are trying to dull it.
4) They are domineering and want me to remain under their control.
Whatever their reason may be, it is very important to understand that there could be some elements of truth in what they are saying. However, you want to be sure that this matter is worth breaking a sweat over.
In order to understand the motive behind the criticism, you need to ask yourself the following question:
• Is this person someone who has been genuinely concerned about your well-being before?
• Is he/she willing to hear your perspective?
• Their criticism, is it legitimate?
• Is it just a case of difference of opinion and value?
Responding To Criticism
Depending on what your findings are from the questions above. If the person seems to be criticizing as a bully, due to inferiority complex or for selfish reasons then you have no business responding to them.
However, if the criticism is coming from a genuine heart. You can do the following:
- Thank the person for their concern.
Take note of what needs to change.
Benefits of Accepting Criticism
- Improved relationship with your critic. This is not to encourage you to accommodate people with poor manners. If the critic delivered his criticism poorly, you have the right to correct them by showing them how you would rather be treated. Acknowledge that they are right in their observation but they should present it this way next time.
Acknowledge that they are right in their observation but they should present it this way next time.
Generally, when you take on to the criticism of a person who has the genuine interest in you, they feel like they are part of your life. They feel valued and this, in turn, increases the bond between both of you.
- Personal Growth: Accepting criticism helps you to be a better person because you are constantly working on yourself to improve on something and become better at something.
- Expands your perspective: You learn to accommodate other people’s opinion by allowing criticism. This also helps you to have a widened perspective and begin to see through the eyes of others.
Helps us become more Self-controlled: Criticism hurts and our ability to train our self to accept them without fighting back helps us to stay humble. The more we train our self to accept constructive criticism, the more we grow into self-controlled people who can accommodate others easily.
When we receive criticism, always remember that we are humans and we are imperfect even the critic himself is nowhere near perfect.
Therefore, I hope you can start accepting criticism when they are coming from a genuine heart and do everything in your power to use them to your advantage.
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Love, Sekinat Sanni.