Hi there!!! Welcome to this week’s Square- it’s been a long week since we had the last one; please, make yourself comfortable.
You just made me remember sometimes ago when someone called me and said: “O’fiq, I want to share something with you”. All I had in my mind was money… please share your money with me! I said “what is it you want to share please”, hoping that he would ask for my account details. “Grab a seat young man,” he said, in his tiny old voice… “you see, there was a wise man that people go and seek advice from.
A young man like you went to him one day and sought his advice… the young man said he used to fornicate, steal, lie, cheat people and all sort of indecent acts. The wise man hung his head for a while and told the young man… “you can continue with other indecent acts you do BUT you should stop lying and before you sleep, come and report to me how your day went”. The young man left not knowing the wise man already cornered him by taking “lies” away from him.
Every time he thought of engaging in any immoral act, it would dawn on him that he would have to report to the wise man later in the day and more so he has vowed not to lie… this curbed him from engaging in it: and that was how he became clean of his indecency”.
After the story, the old man drifted away and there I was- straddled to my seat and couldn’t stand. Weird story, right? That’s exactly my thought and more amazing was how the old man slept off afterward.
This weird story would form the basis of our discussions today.
As we all know in this Square, we say it exactly how it is without mixing words… and one time or another, you must have had misunderstanding or disagreement with someone [your spouse or fiancé(e) to be specific].
To be honest, there isn’t how two people would stay or be together without the moment of misunderstanding or disagreements; how we deal with these moments shows the extent to which we want to stay together.
One major issue in marriages and relationships is infidelity (or simply put, cheating). A research by Durex shows that women are more prone to cheat than men (you can confirm) but should we give room for it at all?
Infidelity doesn’t start over night… it must have been soaring in the mind of the concerned fellow. Frankly, both men and women are susceptible to falling into the oblivious pit of infidelity and the only way we can circumvent the act is to always, no matter how small, not hide anything from our partners. Being in love is easy but staying in it (that’s a topic for another time, ladies, and gentlemen).
Lying is like a virus or a malware… once you tell one, you won’t stop telling more because you won’t see anything bad in it and like the popular saying “a thousand lies to cover for one single lie”.
You two are together and you understand yourselves – you know what you or your partner wants: let us love passionately. There has never been a good result of cheating or infidelity – it’s a means to destruction. The person you’re cheating with has his/her own flaws so, why don’t you maturely complete the flaws in your partners.
I remember the story of one of my uncles and his wife… while they were dating, they had arguments, misunderstanding, and disagreements. The funny thing is that no one understood why they had their disagreements talkless of knowing how to settle it. They always come back together stronger and acting love buds everywhere. They used to say… ‘no one can settle our disagreements save us’… terrible couples right?
You have a family and kids… (or you’re thinking about it) what example do you want to set? What kind of parents do you want to be for your children? Stay faithful or remain single.
Do not pay attention to those people that say “I don’t mind my partner cheating”… there is a lot involved – even your health and life could be at risk. Don’t let us give room for infidelity, stay honest and faithful, love extensively, care passionately, stay humble no matter your status (remember, paper money doesn’t make sound… coins do).
Whenever anyone flaunts anything at you, walk away and later crack jokes about it with your partner… make them know they are relevant. Chairman, stop feeling pompous; apologize – bring your ego down. Madam, you know what is right, beautiful; right and wrong are distinct.
Till we meet next time, I wish you a wonderful week. Bye for now.
Drop your questions below and if you want me to bring any topic into this Square, hit me @olabacare on twitter.