January 3, 2018

I wanted to write down exactly what I felt but somehow the paper stayed empty. And I couldn’t have described it any better: The feeling of emptiness.

“How does it feel (How does it feel)

When you’re alone and you’re cold inside

Like a stranger in Moscow”

Perhaps Michael Jackson was hinting at a feeling of emptiness when he sang this.

Do you ever feel empty on the inside? Like you are living in some kinda bubble or trapped under a bell jar, the world going on around you but you don’t feel to get involved nor seem to care. And when someone asks what is wrong with you, you find it pretty hard to express your plight. That there is the feeling of emptiness.

If you do feel this way, it isn’t abnormal, but it is quite unhealthy. Many people feel empty for different reasons. It could result from a void (something missing), perhaps you are losing/lost a close friend/relation. It could stem from disregarding one’s self whilst clamoring for perfection or some person’s or set of persons’ approval. You are filled with inadequate beliefs about who you are. You think yourself unlovable, unimportant or not good enough. Your ego is wounded, and you are intrinsically flawed.

“I hate the feeling when you really don’t have any emotion. You feel so empty. You’re not happy, you’re not sad, you’re nothing. When your mind is spinning, but you can’t feel anything”

Feeling empty could lead to distressing thoughts and a depressing mindset, a weakening of the body and soul, a resignation that there’s no hope and that life is not worth living. This feeling is mostly heightened by a constant to be weighed down by life’s trivialities.

“Yesterday is history. Tomorrow is a mystery. Today is a gift, that’s why it is called the present”

To overcome the feeling of emptiness, it is imperative to note the following: –

The past is over and finished with. Whatever happened has happened, whatever didn’t happen didn’t happen. Spending time and energy into the present fretting over things now history is only but a waste of time.

The future you never know what it will bring. Your life could change dramatically in the next 24 hours or remain much the same as it is today. Whatever plans you make, the future is out of your direct control.

But today is a gift. It is yours to have here and now. You and only you have the power to assign meaning to your present circumstances. Do not allow yourself to be subjugated to alien meanings imposed on you from those around you. Be self-appraising for this is indeed your present to yourself. Your being becomes only clear when you look into your own heart.

“One who looks outside, dreams. But one who looks inside awakens.”

You are who you are. Discover who you are and respect, love yourself for who you are. Banish influences that will ask you to do anything other than fulfill your own unique destiny. Taking your being off tangent may bring success, achievements and so on but what comes after is an empty hollow feeling of non-fulfillment. You see right through it and know what it is; an illusion. So instead, take a moment and consider your heart, let go of the illusion of control and be true to your own nature. Find it and harmonize with it. It is your friend, not your enemy.

It is dire to, first of all, acknowledge the emptiness to recover from it. Don’t beat yourself up for feeling as such nor try to dismiss your feelings.

Understand the cause and explore your feeling of emptiness;

Fight the urge to turn to the outside world for fulfillment and in that case you learn to live life alongside that void. Celebrate yourself, give yourself credit for the little feats you achieve. Be self-compassionate; whether you are experiencing a difficult relationship, losses or feeling a lack of purpose or meaning. You are worthy of living a fulfilling and meaningful life.

Is there anyone you feel can benefit positively from this article, kindly share with them.

Love, Sekinat Sanni.

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